Snap Judgment
I am going to start this blog with a short story from my past to help frame the perspective of my viewpoint and how I feel that we need to question the judgements we make.
Ever more popular these days in the UK are light walks at Christmas time. As twilight descends, woods and parks become adorned with twinkling lights. illuminating the wintry night as you walk through the enchanting pathways, admiring intricate light sculptures, whimsical decorations, and synchronized light shows. These walks are great for getting you in the spirit, and with everything at Christmas time, there is generally a small market to accompany the event. Allowing you to buy trinket gifts, or just some food and a hot mulled wine to fill your belly.
Many moons ago we were attending one of these events with our young children. They absolutely loved the whole event. Interacting with the lights and looking on in wonder at all the different effects the lights created against the trees. With a nearly 2 miles long walk, we had to carry them every now and then when their little legs got tired, but generally they we were well behaved and distracted from the cold chill of the night.
At the end of the walk, we started to have a look around the market and decided to treat the boys to little light wand from one of the stalls. My wife carried on looking at some trinkets whilst I walked over with my boys to a stall that sold these wands. I could see as I approached that they had two styles of light toys. One was a basic white foam tube will a hollowed-out centre filled with coloured LED lights that flashed. The second toy was only what can be described as a fairy wand which lite up and had a star on the end. The boys immediately knew which one they wanted.
As I approached the stall, the women who owned it took one look at me and told me they had sold out. At this point I felt my heart sink. I knew that I now had the tough job of explaining to two toddlers that they didn’t have any. This was a challenge that I didn’t wish to approach. Trying to tell young children, who don’t understand supply and demand, stocking levels, commerce, or even money, that they couldn’t have what I had promised them, wasn’t going to go down well. I looked round and down at them and could see their cold pricked red cheeks and wide eyes staring back up at me.
Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash
However, as I started to turn my head back to the woman, I noticed a box full of wands.
“What about those” I asked.
“Oh, I am sorry” she replied apologetically, “I thought you would want the other ones.”
The box I had referenced was full of the fairy wands, not the light up foam tubes.
“Um, ok, well can I have 2 of these” I enquired.
We exchanged money and she passed me 2 of the wands, but as she did, she explained to me why she had made the initial assumption she had. She went on to tell me how many young boys that night had been dragged away by their dads kicking and screaming, because they had refused to buy their boys a girly wand. Forcing their boys to either have a light up tube or nothing at all.
I laughed at this crazy idea as I passed my boys their wands and made a throw away comment about how stupid some people are. With that I walked away with two happy boys and enjoyed the rest of our evening.
Why have I told you this short story from my past? And why does it still have a place in my mind?
There are a couple of reasons why this has stuck in my brain. One, is the pure ignorance of people. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being gay, and if either or both of my boys were gay, all I would wish is that they are happy. However, as far as I know random objects are not empowered with the ability to impact anyone’s sexuality, and the fact these idiotic men thought that a toy wand would be the deciding factor is both hilarious and sad. For the sake of their sons and the future, I hope that if any of these children are gay, that these sad men can find it in their hearts to still love and support their sons.
The second reason is the confirmation of how snap judgements lead to misconceptions. The woman on the stall made a judgment of me in an instant. From one look at me she had assumed I was another homophobic idiot. This highlighted to me, in a real-world situation, how making incorrect judgments of people can foster misunderstandings and how snap assessments based on limited information can lead to unfair assumptions, perpetuating biases and stereotypes. Now I am not implying that I was discriminated against. As a straight white man living in the UK, I have never experienced discrimination, but we all experience judgement.
When we do consider discrimination, snap judgments can exacerbate societal division by perpetuating stereotypes and biases. These preconceived notions fuel prejudice and lead to unfair treatment, marginalization, and the reinforcement of harmful stereotypes. This can hinder genuine understanding, empathy, and efforts for social cohesion and unity. Additionally, snap judgments often influence institutional policies and practices, further entrenching systemic inequalities.
Even if we deny it, we are all guilty of making quick judgements of people, but It's crucial to recognize the fallibility of these thoughts. To mitigate division, it's imperative to challenge our snap judgments. When individuals hastily assess others based on superficial traits or limited information, they overlook the richness of diversity, and limit their chance to foster genuine connections.
The problem can often boil down to how our minds are influenced, and this can often be driven by the media we consume. Wielding considerable influence in shaping societal perceptions, the media is often exacerbating discrimination through biased representation and sensationalism. By spotlighting certain groups disproportionately or portraying them in negative stereotypes. Additionally, the dissemination of language or imagery, whether overt or subtle, can normalise discriminatory behaviour.
To counteract this influence, media entities must prioritize accuracy, diversity, and ethical reporting, while consumers must critically evaluate media content. Even if we make snap judgements based on the representation perceived from the media, how we act or communicate those judgements can make the difference between a positive or negative experience. Just by taken a split second to evaluate and question a judgement with empathy and acceptance can make all the difference. Furthermore, we can counteract these influences through education.
It’s important that we live in this world with open-mindedness whilst striving for understanding and empathy. A willingness to challenge preconceived notions can be done with trust and active listening. Doing this, can lead to mutual respect and help us recognise our similarities.
